This birth experience, while not what I had originally hoped for, was one of the best, most empowering experiences of my life. I attribute this to Hypnobirthing methods, my labor support team, as well as the medical staff at my hospital, all of whom supported and encouraged me 100% through the ups and downs of my 18 hours of labor.
On Friday, April 1st, I had my 39 week appointment with my OB. At that time, I had an internal exam, and I was discouraged to discover that my Bishop Scale score was a zero. My cervix was posterior, high, hard, closed, and baby girl was at a -4 station. My OB wanted to schedule me for either an induction or a C-section on April 14th, which would be just shy of 41 weeks. I hesitantly agreed to be “penciled in” for that date, but I left the appointment feeling uneasy about the decision. I fretted over it all weekend, but after talking with several friends, I decided that I needed to try to relax about it, and I wrote down some questions for my OB that I planned to ask at my next appointment on April 8th.
On Sunday, April 3rd, I had a thick egg white mucous discharge all day long. While I was encouraged by this, I also knew it didn’t necessarily mean anything.
On Monday, April 4th, I woke up and went to the bathroom at 8 a.m. I still had a lot of discharge, and when I stood up, there was a significant trickle down my leg. Like many other women, I thought maybe I’d just lost control of my bladder, but I was also hopeful that my membranes were rupturing. I told my husband what I thought might be happening, and he jumped out of bed, wondering what we should do. I told him to start getting together some of the things that we hadn’t yet packed but to not get too excited yet.
I called a doula friend to ask her opinion, and she suggested calling my OB’s office to go in and be checked. I took her advice and made an appointment to go in and get checked within the hour. I called my Mom and told her what was going on. When I stood up to start getting ready, it became clear that I had not lost control of my bladder but that my membranes had most definitely ruptured. I was excited but nervous as I was having no other signs of labor. I considered staying home for a while, but my water kept gushing and gushing, and I became anxious about it. I called my OB’s off ice and told them that I didn’t think there was any need to be checked, and that I would instead be going straight to L&D.
I took a shower and finished packing some last minute items, called my Mom and Mother-in-Law to tell them what was happening, and we left for the hospital.
At 9:45 a.m., I was checked into my room. I was dilated only 1 cm, 50% effaced, and baby girl was still at a -4 station. I was hooked up to a monitor, and we discovered that I was having contractions, but they were very weak. I was not in “active labor”.
At 11:00, I saw my OB. At that time, I was 1.5 cm dilated, 70% effaced, but there was no change in baby’s position. I was barely feeling surges and didn’t even need to breathe through them since they were so weak. My doctor wanted to start Pitocin right away, but I got permission to try some other things first. I spent the next hour and a half on the birth ball and walking the halls trying to get labor to pick up on its own.
At 12:30 P.M., the surges were still mild. I had to breathe through them a bit, but they were barely registering on the monitor. There was no change in dilation, effacement, or station. I bought myself 30 more minutes, but at 1:00 P.M., I agreed to start on a low dose of Pitocin.
Over the next 2-3 hours, the surges started to get stronger and closer together. I was using Hypnobirthing breathing and relaxation techniques to get through them. My nurse, doctor, and labor buddy (my sister-in-law) all commented on how well I was breathing and shared some very encouraging words with me. They all believed I could continue on without an epidural and they shared over and over how impressed they were with how focused and relaxed I seemed to be.
At 4:30 P.M., I had my first internal since 11 A.M. At this time, I was dilated 4 cm, I was 80% effaced, and baby girl had moved down to a -2 station. This is still very high, and for the first time, my OB mentioned the possibility of a C-section . He said he knew it wasn’t what I wanted and that he still believed that baby could move down, but he wanted me to have time to get used to the possibility. I continued to use Hypnobirthing relaxation techniques to keep me calm and focused. I kept repeating a line from my affirmations, “I set all fear aside as I prepare for the birth of my baby.”
Over the next 2 hours, the surges became so strong and close together, that I began having some difficulty breathing through them because as soon as one would end another would begin. I asked to sit on the toilet for a while, as I was sure I needed to have a bowel movement. I sat there for about 30 minutes trying to breathe through the surges.
By 6:30 P.M., I was 6 cm. dilated and 90% effaced, but baby had moved back up to a -3station. At this point, I decided I was going to ask for an epidural. I knew with 4 cm to go and baby so high up that labor could go on for many more hours, and while I was willing to labor as long as possible in order to have a vaginal delivery, my breathing was becoming ineffective. I was rocking and crying. While they were trying to hide it, I could tell my husband, sister-in-law, and nurse were becoming a bit stressed out as they watched me writhe in pain. At no time did any of them suggest I seek out pain relief. The decision was 100% my own and I was at peace with the decision.
At 7:00 P.M., I received the epidural and within 20-30 minutes, I was completely relaxed (and so was my support team haha!)
At 9:00 P.M., I was checked again. I was dilated 8-9 cm, my cervix was pretty much 100% effaced, but baby girl was still hanging out between a -2 and -3 station. Again, my OB mentioned the possibility of a C-section. In my mind, I had continued to repeat some of my favorite Hypnobirthing affirmations, and I reacted so calmly to the possibility that he kept asking my husband, “Does she understand what I am telling her?” My husband assured him that I was fully aware of what was going on.
My mother-in-law and sister-in-law called and asked if they could visit for a while, and since I’d had the epi, I said they could. They stayed until about 11:00 P.M.
At 11:30 P.M., I was completely dilated and effaced, but baby was still not budging. My OB told me that he really wanted me to be able to deliver vaginally, and he told me to push for the next hour or so and then the nurse would call him with my progress. Over the next hour and a half, I breathed and pushed to no avail. Baby girl was not moving down much.
At 1 A.M., my OB stopped by and told me that she seemed to move down “a little bit”, so he was going to give me another hour before we would make any final decisions.
At 2 A.M., not only had she not moved down, but she moved back up some. We discussed the C-section, and I decided to consent. Just as when I consented to the epidural, I was completely at peace with the decision. I continued to use Hypnobirthing breathing and relaxation techniques to keep me calm and focused. I truly HAD set all fear aside, and I was completely prepared for the birth of my baby.
At 2:43 A.M. on April 5th, 2011, Elinor Catherine was born via C-section. She was 9 lbs, 2 oz, and 21 inches of absolute perfection. She has dark hair, her Daddy’s eyes, her Mommy’s nose, and the cutest dimples in her chubby cheeks and chin that I have ever seen.
